An Accidental Publishing

fog at Mystic Seaport

A year ago, I travelled to America and wrote a book, amongst many other things (sort-of-fainting, firefly spottings, book bingeing, wearing a polka dot dress with blue tights and red shoes – you know, the usual).

Inspired by Mystic Seaport, several friends and I sat around a table and concocted a plot. It was going to have action, adventure, a spice of mystery and a great dollop of humour. (Humour spelt without that English ‘u’, by the way).

And then, plot developed,  I settled down to the task of bringing our plot bubbles, character sheets and knock, knock jokes to life.

And so I did. My friend proof-read it, just to make sure that I had the American lingo down to pat. These things are important, you know. I’d never consciously written ‘sneakers’ before. Or ‘potato chips’. It was all very novel.

Once this was done – the night before I departed from Uncle Sam’s shores, I finished the Blurb book of ‘Accidental Adventure’ and ordered two copies: one for my friends, and one for me.

And that was that, the books arrived at their destinations and my version sat on my shelf. I dabbled in a little editing, but it was largely untouched. Until … until now.

Because I am a contrary creature, who apparently detests doing the things I am actually supposed to be doing (*cough* Our Intrepid Heroine the Second *cough*), in honour of the anniversary of my trip to the U S of A, I decided to publish ‘Accidental Adventure’ – the story that was written before Our Intrepid Heroine was completed.

Much editing, overhauling, adding and subtracting later, it is done. Drum-roll please …

ouraccidentaladventureaquaOne moment they are sailing across a sheltered bay for a camping trip, the next they are surrounded by fog and end up in the Caribbean.

Or are they?

A highly improbable adventure, in which fishermen wear suits, English gentlemen aren’t quite what they seem and three siblings can’t tell friend from foe.

It’s contemporary, Christian, sprinkled with knock, knock jokes and dosed with wildly improbable happenings. But you know what? Suspend your disbelief for just a little while, and sail along with a tale born around a circular table, across the proverbial pond.

Kindle // Goodreads

books, ness talks about life, ness writes about writing

I Love Lucy, Presents and Books being Published

I have discovered I love Lucy and now have Season 1 coming in the post. But don’t tell my family – it’s a Christmas present. Ahem.

… and in other news

I am quite happy to announce that Our Intrepid Heroine is up and running. Not literally. But metaphorically.

*wipes eye* it’s so … beautiful.



There are three things that you really ought to know about our Intrepid Heroine: Firstly, she cannot pronounce ‘felicitations’. Secondly, a unicorn is following her about. Thirdly, she’s on her way to kill a dragon.

A dragon that has killed an entire flock of her father’s sheep, three goats and one pig.

And a frog.

Throw in a command from a King, a knight (or two), and a mysterious Hooded Person of Unknown Gender and this dragon had better watch his scales.

Have a great week!

books, ness rambles, ness talks about life, ness writes about writing

The Proof has come – and I have proof!

So this is a post which I meant to post on Friday. And then I moved it forward a little. ‘I’ll post it then,’ I thought. But then I didn’t. Because reasons. So now I’m posting it late. Oh well …

Do you ever have moments of ‘Squee!’? I do. And I did last Friday morning.

The Proof … has come.

… and here is proof of the Proof.

I’ll admit it – I’ve not mentioned Our Intrepid Heroine in a post before. But I’ve been steadily working away at it and now, after weeks of waiting, the Proof has come.

The first moments of holding your book in your hands are beautiful. Disbelief and wiggle-squeals take hold of your emotions. And then you flick through the book and see your words upon a page, your story told in actual ink. It is quite wonderful …

quotereally2But I’d better back-track a little because I’m sure that you have some puzzled questions. (Or perhaps you haven’t, but I’m going to answer your not-so-puzzled questions anyway.)

Our Intrepid Heroine is a short story of eighty-seven pages. It is the tale of a Heroine who sets off to obey the command of a King. Namely, to kill a dragon. Things don’t turn out quite the way she expects them to.

She wanted to slay a dragon. In peace. Was that too much to ask?

Yes, apparently it was.

Narrated by a scatter-brained, scholarly-minded gentlemen and divided into tips (not chapters), I vastly enjoyed writing this completly unorthodox tale – and the characters within its pages.

Particularly the Hooded Person of Unknown Gender. And the Female, ah yes – the Female.

“I’ve waited every day and stared out into the horizon just like my stories say. But,” said the Female, “I don’t think I’ve got the longing look right. Does this look longing enough?”

So while I work gallently away at the paperback version of this short novella, I have the proof beside me and I’m not at all ashamed to say that I pick it up and flick its pages often.

And while the backcover may prove to be tricky to format, the final product will be worth it. Because having an ebook isn’t quite the same as holding a Proper Book in one’s hand.

However, it is still the cheaper option I suppose.