Books, Life

book hoarding and a buying ban: an update of sorts

As you know – or don’t, that’s okay too – I’ve embarked on a book buying ban. Namely, on my last count, I own a lot of books that I haven’t read. The number shames me. Shames! Me!

So, taking matters – and the books, though not all at once – into my own hands, I decided to read 45 of those books.

When I was telling someone from church about this last year, they asked how long it would take me to read all 45.

“Oh,” I said breezily, probably wafting my hand in the air. “Maybe a month or two.”

THREE MONTHS LATER …

At the time of writing, Book 18 is being devoured: ‘The Ministry of Truth’ by Dorian Lynskey is about George Orwell and the creation of 1984. It’s grabbed my interest and has yet to let go. So far? I highly recommend it.

But though I am in the middle of this experience, I have already been learning some lessons. Let me share them with you.

I FEEL BETTER ABOUT MYSELF

Though the list of books I wish to read at the end of this is growing, I feel much better about myself. I’m not longer buying with eyes too big for my bookreading stomach (just go with that analogy). I’m reading what I have. And – astonishingly enough – what I have is really interesting.

Who’d have thunk it, right?

This year has been marked by me trying to be more mindful of the money I’m spending, the time I waste, the books I read, the clothes I buy etc etc. This book buying ban? It’s been so very useful.

I do not need to chase after the next book, the next interesting title … I just need to enjoy the ones I have.

BLAM! UNEXPECTED DOSE OF CONTENTMENT STRIKES UNEXPECTEDLY.

look at all the books that I *didn’t* buy when I stumbled upon a booksale.

COULD BOOKSTAGRAM BE … UNHEALTHY??

Taking pictures of books and posting them to Instagram is one of life’s little pleasures. However, it has made me question my motives: am I doing it because, personally, it’s something that feels like an expression of creativity OR – more to the point – does it have a whiff of boastfulness about it? A sort of: ‘Behold! I read this book! Bow to me! I am intelligent!’

I hope it doesn’t, but I am growing increasingly wary of Instagram – what are my motives? Why am I even posting this? Is this for my ego? Or is it because sometimes I have to express myself and ramble and to get things off my chest and I use this blog and that Instagram account to do so? (also I relish taking pictures of books and thinking oh wow this has much goodness. First, Instagram – next? NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC!)

We all know that social media can be incredibly unhealthy – showing life how we want to be perceived instead of how we actually are, promoting comparisons and that general feeling of being less and having a life that isn’t quite as good as anybody else’s.

Does my validation come by the number of likes and retweets a post receives? (I mean, if that’s the case, let’s be honest … I am in deep trouble.)

I keep a book reading diary to log what I’m reading and my thoughts regarding it. I don’t update Goodreads anymore because I was so darn proud of the statistics and I just knew that that was the first stage to unabated narcissism and grandiose delusions of grandeur. I don’t post pictures of every single book I’ve read because:

  1. I’m lazy
  2. I have a crisis of what is the point does this help anyone oh gosh nothing I’ve posted about books HELPS anyone why would anyone listen to my book recommendations OH WAIT it’s fine I’ll do it anyway no I won’t I can’t be bothered OH MY WORD WHAT IF THE WORLD FIGURES OUT MY PERSONALITY BASED ON THE BOOKS I’VE READ also what if this makes people think they need to buy ALL the books am I promoting an unhealthy mindset also I think my ego is far larger than I’ve ever suspected also I think I’d be a terrible regency heroine because my ankles aren’t finely turned.
  3. I’m occasionally paranoid in a HELP BRING SMELLING SALTS kind of way.
  4. Something in this world has to be private, dang it!

Though possibly overthinking everything can also be unhealthy, it’s worthwhile to examine my motivations.

ALSO THIS PICTURE MAKES ME LAUGH AND ONE DAY I WILL HATE MYSELF FOR PUTTING IT HERE BUT HAHA BEHOLD:

Though the book was good, I assure you I was not worshiping it. Also, my armpits have never looked finer. I’M SORRY.

THE EBOOK VS PAPERBACK DEBATE HAS BEEN SOLVED FOR ME

It’s hardbacks and paperbacks and smelling the pages in front of your face. I used to read far more ebooks, but since the great ebook cleanse of December ’19 (300 novels! DELETED!) I’ve been reading almost exclusively paperbacks and hardbacks.

It’s just too easy to spend money on ebooks. In my tumultuous past, I’ve inhaled novels by the dozen. Read two or three in one day. It’s almost shocking how much money – and, more importantly, time – I’ve spent on Kindle.

This ban has forced me to take a step back. To enjoy what I have instead of chasing after what I haven’t. It’s not hoarding if it’s books, one of my cups says. But … to be frank … if I’m buying book after book after book and not reading them … it certainly feels like it is.

I’m all for building a personal library, but I want to do it in a mindful manner. Not in a frenzy of buying a stack of books I’ve haven’t read.

Happy reading!

Books, Life

confessions of a bookstagramer

I crochet, harbour world conquering aspirations, and oh! I take pictures of books. Here are three bookstagram related confessions of mine …

1 // once, i drove out into the countryside to get a good picture

Newly bitten by the bookstagram bug, I took a flask of tea, a library book, and one of my favourite Rosemary Sutcliff novels out into the Peak District. I climbed a rocky out-crop, saw breathtaking views, sipped tea and took pictures of my books when no one was around. As you do.

dawnwind

Convincing myself that I did it just to get out in the great outdoors didn’t work. Nope. I wanted a darn good picture of a book. And I got one. #proudofit

Image result for rejoicing gif

2 // i don’t read with fairy lights

I love fairy lights. I have them over my mirror, tangled in my bookcases and spread on my desk. I love fairy lights, but I do not read with them on my lap. Before bookstagram, I never considered arranging fairy lights on my bed, making sure my legs didn’t look too odd, and sitting at an awkward angle.

But then bookstagram happened, and I found myself wanting to share my current read. In an artful, completely impractical way.

fairylightsthegoblin

3 // i take books outside and stuff ’em in bushes

IT MADE SENSE AT THE TIME, OKAY?! A book about Jane? As in Tarzan and Jane? Take it outside and put it in the shrubbery. Now. Just do it.

janeinabush
observe the perfection!

But then someone on Instagram noticed. And so, when my birthday rolled around, they insisted a picture needed to be taken of my cake. In the fuchsias. Just because.

cakeinbush
oh ho ho. very funny